Not much to post

Ya ever have one of those evenings when you know it's time to post, but you don't have much to say?  That's where I am tonite.  When those times hit, that's about the time I usually end up saying the most.  Who knows where this will lead . . . 

Thanksgiving was nice.  Hope things went well on your end.  We went to my folks in the afternoon.  Mom had prepared the good stuff that we like.  Of course, Megan & I went over the evening before and did all the prep work so all Mom had to do in the morning was turn it on and plug it in.  It was so easy for her she even found some time to work on a sewing craft for awhile.  This was good, especially as she is dealing with some pain/hip issues right now and is not getting around quite at normal speed.  I made turkey & noodles for lunch today, imagine that!

Heidi & Mom got up at 5:30 this morning to go hit sales at a local fabric & craft store.  The girls used coupons and saved a about $200 between them.  I guess that was worth sacrificing a little sleep.  Heidi is all excited, she is really enjoying quilting these days.  She is on her 2nd one, designing & assembling it herself.  She is doing a good job.  I think she could almost take off in another direction besides medical at this point.  Megan is also getting into the crafting stuff.  She loves making pin cushions.  She made a mushroom pin-cushion tonight just for fun.  She also enjoys beadwork and is beginning to really churn out some quality stuff.

The family is bummed because we're missing our dog, Samson.  Sammy is a king silver-shepherd, about 5-yrs. old, 100 lbs. current on shots and neutered.  He's been missing since Saturday, 11-21-09.  He also has a micro-chip in his shoulder, so we have hope that someday, if he's out there, he may be returned.  He is the kind of dog that people "notice" if we take him with us (in the back of the pickup).  We have often been asked if we will sell him or if they could have pups off him.  We feel fairly certain someone picked him up.  We wonder how, as he is not overly friendly to strangers.  He is also the leader of all the dogs, if he goes somewhere, the others follow.  We have the 2 others but no Sammy.  Heidi is devastated as she was the most attached.  We have notified the shelters and will begin posting reward pictures as soon as the holiday weekend allows the copy shop to do it's job.  (Sometimes I hate holiday weekends -- everything shuts down and it's impossible to accomplish anything.)
We would appreciate prayer and open eyes for Sammy.  He could be anywhere . . .

Our Suburban has just been repaired and put back into service after being down for a week.  Steven was driving last Friday when the passenger-front brake started to make noise.  He became cautious, pulled over, called his Dad (who was within 1/2 a mile in the milk truck).  There was nothing obvious, but the noises indicated a problem.  Steven limped home at 25 mph.  We called our mechanic who told us to bring it in.  Sunday evening, we started out, got about 1/4 of a mile from home.  Brian stopped, pulled off the hub covering and found a large bolt completely sheared off.  He showed it to me (I was following in a 2nd car), explaining this was the bolt holding the tire on the axle.  Not good.  He carefully turned around, driving very slowly, came back home.  He lifted the car and found the only thing holding the wheel on at that point was the rotor, which explained the noises that Steven was hearing originally.  This was definitely one of those situations that could have been much worse.  Thankfully, we were able to get the parts, it wasn't too difficult, Brian & the boys made the repairs.  Steven & I located the special-order bolts from Chevy tonite 15 minutes before the dealership closed.  Yay!  Won't have to wait for an order to arrive from next Tuesday!  What an adventure.  We can pretty much plan on some type of breakdown, either with a milk truck or something else over a holiday weekend.  Never fails.  However, I will state that we can live without the Burbie easier than one of the trucks.  These things do work out!

Tomorrow is Gram's 85th birthday.  Wow.  Mom plans a mystery ride and an early breakfast surprise for her.  Later in the day, we plan to play our dulcimers, setting out our tip jar, playing Christmas music and just having fun for a couple of hours.  We'll set Gram up in a folding chair and let her just listen and people watch.  How's that for a good birthday?  She'll love it.  We have a few other things planned, but that will probably be later into next week. 

Okay, gotta go.  I guess for not having much to say, I did alright.  Hope you enjoy your weekend!

Friends  ~  Terri

To Earn His Love

Been thinking lately, might be good, might be bad.  Most of my friends on Xanga know my daughter, Heidi, also has a blog.  She was the one who got me started originally.  She has dropped away now, using other sources to connect, which is fine.  But, she did a post not too long ago about her recent breakup with her boyfriend.  It's been a rough stretch for her.  She fell pretty hard, dating for about 10 months, going into it with long term plans, thinking he was the one.  Hindsight is always 20/20, as they say. Today I think about things that should have been warning signs that all was not healthy in the land of love . . .

When she began the relationship, he was very attentive.  Texting, calling, it was an all-the-time thing (to the point that it drove the rest of us crazy with the interruptions).  His interest and attention helped her to finally pull away emotionally from a bad relationship.  The previous relationship was one that left us feeling helpless & frustrated as parents.  She continued bending over backwards for this guy even though he was borderline abusive.  She was trying to earn his love.  After boyfriend #2 arrived on the scene, things seemed better.  She was happy, glowing from the inside out.  However, after about 6 months, things started to cool.  He didn't seem interested in spending time with us, her family, always requiring that she go his direction.  As time passed, there was less give and more take, she was doing more and more for him all the time, trying to earn his love.  We had a few discussions then, but as before, Heidi was unwilling to see the caution signs.  The guy had better character (or so we thought), but the behavior was still the same, both from Heidi and the guy.

So, I have to wonder, is it the guys or is it my daughter?  As the old saying goes, the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree.

I am a "mover & a shaker" here at home.  I serve my family, keeping things moving so we don't drown in dishes or laundry.  I am the motivator for the homeschooling.  If Brian calls with a need from the milk route, I drop everything and run for parts or help or whatever.  If Gram calls because she needs something, either I or one of the kids are right there to help.  Every morning (as the schedule permits), Matt & I are usually down there for breakfast to help her start her day and to read her the paper or anything else that needs attention.  Then there are my folks.  Dad went through his rehab after his motorcycle accident a couple of summers ago, but he is 68 and we are seeing memory lapses and less agility.  Mom is dealing with nerve issues around her spine, causing pain in her hips.  Her motivation is still very high, but her mobility is not what it used to be, which frustrates her.  We are only a couple of miles away and often go to help if they tell us.  We help Steve & Nan, good friends who have no one else to call for larger tasks.  We also help out at the church as needed.  So, you see, our lives revolve around the people in our lives, hopefully with a heart of genuine service. 

This is not necessarily a bad thing, as long as we keep the proper attitude:  realizing that no one is indispensable, that it's not healthy for any relationship to be overly dependent in one direction, that it should not be a "glory trip", or a means to earn another's love.  I consider it a privilege to help out, a means to show our love in service.  I'm sure that Heidi's motives were also good, at least at first.  But things change, this is how we learn & grow, even in painful relationships.  My prayer is that she has matured so that if & when the time is right, and the Lord sends along a lifetime companion.  Someone who will appreciate her gift of service without taking advantage of it -- someone who shares her heart for service.  This is the stuff that good relationships are built on, self-respect and commitment to the relationship and to others.

It is a pattern we take from Christ.  He came to give for us.  We could not earn his love but we can show our acceptance of it in service to others.  Anything less is selfishness.

Show a little appreciation today  ~  Terri 



   

The Next Step

I'm feeling very uneasy about all the healthcare plans in Washington.  I don't necessarily want to turn this post into a political "rant", but it's been on my mind a lot lately.  I find it amazing those who voted for Obama now make the claim, "We had no idea he would be so radical!"  It's all I can do to keep from saying, "well, duh!"

Our radio wakes us up in the morning. On Saturday, when the reporter announced that the House had passed their version of a massive healthcare overhaul, with the quote from Nancy Pelosi about "this historic day", I wanted to believe I was still dreaming a bad dream.  This, of course, does not make it law -- yet.  The Senate must reach some sort of agreement on their own version, and then the two bills have to reach a point of compromise.  But, the fact that we are one more step in the wrong direction just about makes me nauseated.  Our government has proposed legislation in the past which takes our money, our choice and threatens jail with non-compliance (I'm thinking of income taxes, but I'm sure there are others), but never on this scale, on such a massive level with such huge implications for everyone.

My daughter has suggested sometime soon, I should do a post on homeschooling.  I may.  But, I cannot help but compare our current educational bureaucracy (and mess) with what they want to do with medicine.  This is our health, the quality of our life.  Do we really want a doctor to consult some government manual about what he can or cannot do, based on what will be allowed or what we can afford?  Most of those in favor of a government takeover just see "free" healthcare for all.  Nothing is ever free . . . 

Just yesterday, I read a story about a preemie born in England.  The British have established rules for the gestation period.  In other words, if a child is born at 22 weeks, life saving measures can be applied.  This child was born at 21 weeks, 5 days, which is 2 days short according to the guidelines.  The doctors denied care even though the mother asked for it.  The child could not survive without intervention, the mother held her daughter for two hours until she died with the doctors nearby, watching.  How cold is that?  The mother is out to change things, the NHS (National Health Service) is doing some backpedaling, so here we go.  Now the British Assoc. of Perinatal Medicine is claiming "'the guidelines were not meant to be a set of instructions'.  But guidelines soon become protocols and protocols morph into rules; rules that if broken, require explanations and result in discipline for the rule-breaker.  Rules that, if followed, save the NHS millions of pounds."

Today's medical advances are wonderful.  Science has increased lifespan and quality of life.  We have all benefited by the knowledge that has been gained, but it doesn't come without a price.  A few hundred years ago, I would not be expected to live much past my current age.  It was unheard of for a person to live as long as my Grandmother, who will turn 85 later this month, to even still be alive.  Somehow, we need to achieve a balance, to respect the dignity of a life as opposed to the medical cost of maintaining that life.  We also need to achieve an acceptance, of the idea that this life is temporary.  No matter how many more additional years science may eventually give us, sooner or later we will still share the same destination.

Our government cannot resolve these issues simply by passing mandates and laws, just look at the abortion debate.  A lot has been resolved there -- not! 

Stay informed.  Get involved.  Know the issues and as the Senate version comes to light, lets bring some sanity to this discussion.

Friends  ~  Terri