The Next Step

I'm feeling very uneasy about all the healthcare plans in Washington.  I don't necessarily want to turn this post into a political "rant", but it's been on my mind a lot lately.  I find it amazing those who voted for Obama now make the claim, "We had no idea he would be so radical!"  It's all I can do to keep from saying, "well, duh!"

Our radio wakes us up in the morning. On Saturday, when the reporter announced that the House had passed their version of a massive healthcare overhaul, with the quote from Nancy Pelosi about "this historic day", I wanted to believe I was still dreaming a bad dream.  This, of course, does not make it law -- yet.  The Senate must reach some sort of agreement on their own version, and then the two bills have to reach a point of compromise.  But, the fact that we are one more step in the wrong direction just about makes me nauseated.  Our government has proposed legislation in the past which takes our money, our choice and threatens jail with non-compliance (I'm thinking of income taxes, but I'm sure there are others), but never on this scale, on such a massive level with such huge implications for everyone.

My daughter has suggested sometime soon, I should do a post on homeschooling.  I may.  But, I cannot help but compare our current educational bureaucracy (and mess) with what they want to do with medicine.  This is our health, the quality of our life.  Do we really want a doctor to consult some government manual about what he can or cannot do, based on what will be allowed or what we can afford?  Most of those in favor of a government takeover just see "free" healthcare for all.  Nothing is ever free . . . 

Just yesterday, I read a story about a preemie born in England.  The British have established rules for the gestation period.  In other words, if a child is born at 22 weeks, life saving measures can be applied.  This child was born at 21 weeks, 5 days, which is 2 days short according to the guidelines.  The doctors denied care even though the mother asked for it.  The child could not survive without intervention, the mother held her daughter for two hours until she died with the doctors nearby, watching.  How cold is that?  The mother is out to change things, the NHS (National Health Service) is doing some backpedaling, so here we go.  Now the British Assoc. of Perinatal Medicine is claiming "'the guidelines were not meant to be a set of instructions'.  But guidelines soon become protocols and protocols morph into rules; rules that if broken, require explanations and result in discipline for the rule-breaker.  Rules that, if followed, save the NHS millions of pounds."

Today's medical advances are wonderful.  Science has increased lifespan and quality of life.  We have all benefited by the knowledge that has been gained, but it doesn't come without a price.  A few hundred years ago, I would not be expected to live much past my current age.  It was unheard of for a person to live as long as my Grandmother, who will turn 85 later this month, to even still be alive.  Somehow, we need to achieve a balance, to respect the dignity of a life as opposed to the medical cost of maintaining that life.  We also need to achieve an acceptance, of the idea that this life is temporary.  No matter how many more additional years science may eventually give us, sooner or later we will still share the same destination.

Our government cannot resolve these issues simply by passing mandates and laws, just look at the abortion debate.  A lot has been resolved there -- not! 

Stay informed.  Get involved.  Know the issues and as the Senate version comes to light, lets bring some sanity to this discussion.

Friends  ~  Terri     

Xanga vs. Facebook

I've been hearing a lot lately about how many people have joined Facebook, how it's the largest site on the net these days, blah, blah, blah.  It seems like everybody that's anybody has a page on it. 

Heidi set me up with a page.  It's fine, she actually uses it more than I do.  I am more comfortable on Xanga.  I am familiar with it, so some of the issue is me actually becoming familiar with Facebook, which I do intend to do soon.  Another reason I am reluctant to give it much time right now is because of our slow system -- (I know, I called Embarq a few months back and they're talking about another year or so for our region.  I'm too cheap to sink a lot of $$ into our service, so we'll just wait.)

A couple of summers back, I went to my 25 yr. class reunion.  It was a bomb.  Never again.  Beyond that, everyone was exchanging computer addresses.  One of the "movers & shakers" was pushing hard for everyone to stay connected on Facebook.  Whatever.  So, Heidi sets me up a while ago, I never even gave this whole incident any thought.  Low & behold, within a few days, my new site is being bombarded with old acquaintances (notice the word "friends" is stretching it?), people I really don't care to know their every move or thought, who are ancient history.  It was overwhelming, especially as I was just learning the site.  Heidi went in an totally restricted my site to people who I actually know.  A friend from college, a few cousins, etc.  I think I will be ready to loosen the restrictions eventually, but . . .  Anyway, because of all of this, the people who actually read me on Facebook, know me.  They are people who might be hurt if I start up a rant against homosexuality, Obamacare or any other hot topic.  This has the potential to affect the relationships of the people around me.  Therefore, I feel inhibited on Facebook.  I would like to just "lay it on the line" like I do at times here, but I don't feel that I can.

Why do you think Heidi goes in on my site at Facebook and does stuff?  Because she can be incongnito.  It's kind of the same principle.

So, for all you people who think it's not worth it keep two sites or more open, all I can say is whatever.  You know your time limitations and obligations, you need to do what works for you.  As for me, I intend to keep both sites going.  There are some posts on Xanga that I really don't want to lose, stuff that goes back awhile.  If you do eventually have a Facebook site, let me know.  Friends made are friends worth keeping (unless you're an ancient classmate  )

Just jumping on  ~  Terri 

Too Much Faith?

Hey, greetings!  I'm still alive and kicking!  Sorry I haven't been more regular in my Xanga-time, but I have a feeling I am not alone.  Summer just brings on all kind of activities and sometimes you just have to go with it.  We played a gig yesterday (not the best one yet, but that's another story).  We've been gleaning green beans from a couple of nearby fields (I've canned 28 qts.). The farmer has taken what he wants, now anyone can go in and pick from the remaining plants.  You would be amazed at what is left in the fields.  Brian & I are still trying to maintain our 2-mile daily walk.  We are doing school (sporadically) and the kids are swimming, biking & horse riding.  We are talking about breaking away for 3 or 4 days in early August, going to a nearby chain-of-lakes state park, camping out.  We'll see.  Busy, busy, busy!

Anyway, what I wanted to share today is of a different nature.  Because of the green beans nearby, I called Dan & Karen.  They were very interested, bringing their kids to pick for the day.  It was a fun outing.  Their kids & ours worked together and had a rare chance to visit and get connected.  (Dan & Karen used to live near us, they have since moved about 45 min. away on a small farm.  Dan eventually quit his job, using the farm & her in-home typing as income.  They homeschool their 4 kids with a more "isolationist" mentality than we do.)  We stay connected, but not as often.

Since the family was close, I asked them to come for lunch.  We threw burgers, brats & grilled onions on, pulling out a watermelon, potatoe chips & sandwich fixin's and calling it a feast.  We started out with a lot of food, eventually feeding 13 people.  There wasn't much left over.  During lunch, Dan & Karen made an obvious point to tell me that they had some news to share.  After I gave them my attention, Karen explained that she was 1-month pregnate.  I was shocked.  I mean, I tried not to let my astonishment overwhelm me, but I was astounded.  I said, "Karen, you had your tubes tied after Jason.", (their 4th child).  She responded, "Yes, but I had the operation reversed 5 years ago.  Didn't I tell you?"  Uh, no!  Karen is a year older than I.  She just turned 47.

I really don't have a problem with late-in-life surprise babies.  It happens.  I also believe that if a child is conceived unexpectedly, this child is a gift from God.  It's a living testimony that sometimes life throws you curve balls.  However, this child was not a surprise.  He was not totally unexpected.  They have been trying for the past 5 years to conceive.  Wow.  Is this child any less of a gift.  Of course not.  Is he still a curve ball?  He is in my mind, but apparently, this is one curve ball that was expected.  Karen went on to explain, "When I had Jason, I really felt like our family was large enough.  I pressured Dan into allowing the operation even when he was reluctant.  I realize now that this was an offense to him."  Was it really? 

I remember a young mother with 4 young children who was feeling very overwhelmed at the time, balancing her home and the chaos of little ones, investigating homeschooling options for her older children (against her family's wishes), trying to support her husband in his self-employment ventures and feeling like having babies was a strain to her heart & body.  Should a husband feel offense because his wife is feeling overwhelmed and needs to know there is a limit?  It doesn't seem unreasonable to me to expect some sort of understanding on the issue.  Dan & Karen are extremely excited with this new life.  There was a connection between them, a sparkle in the air, almost like newlyweds again.  I expressed my congratulations, of course.

The next evening, Dan called.  Brian & I were out walking, I returned his call when we received the message.  Dan shared with me that Karen began spotting, she immediately laid down, which helped.  Dan called a mid-wife friend, Kathy explained that older women do not produce the progesterone needed (as in our younger days), that an over-the-counter cream was needed to supply the lack.  Dan picked some up for Karen and I haven't heard if there was any more problems.

Now, my question is this:  At what point does our faith intersect with practicality?  The pro-life movement has argued with the pro-choice movement over this technicality for years, with no resolution in sight.  This is not to say that I agree with the pro-choice people.  Not by any stretch of the imagination or circumstances, but in this case, if the child is carried to term, if he is healthy & normal (Down Syndrome is usually an issue for late-in-life pregnacies), there will be 11 years between him and his closest sibling.  His parents will be almost 70 by the time he is 20, to begin the whole baby/diaper/toddler/homeschooling thing all over again just seems overwhelming to me.  The Lord encourages us to be wise in our choices, to "count the cost".  Have they?  They have decided against telling others for several more months, especially her side of the family as they know what they will hear.  We love babies, there are times when I've wondered if we quit too soon, but this seems almost extreme to me.  I'm wondering why adoption or foster care wasn't an option, there are so many children who are in need.  Honestly, we've considered it at times, but it's just not a good fit right now. 

Am I just looking at the practicality too much?  Not enough faith?  Or do they have too much faith?  Is there such a thing?  I didn't think it was possible, to have too much faith.  But it's almost like they are expecting God to wave a magic wand, to change the circumstances of aging so they can have another child.  Anything is possible with the Lord, but we often bear the consequences of our choices, even when we've moved past healing & forgiveness.  Is the child going to bear the consequences of their choices?  On one hand, I want to be glad for them, but right now, I just am concerned.  I guess I wouldn't have made a good Sarah (of Sarah & Abraham).

What do you think?  Friends  ~  Terri 

** P.S., she miscarried 3 days later.